Satan never leads a woman to after-abortion healing. Never. The powerful truth is that those drawn to experience after abortion healing are called by Jesus Christ himself (Matt. 11:28-30). Often, there’s a debate about the type of book study that would appeal best to this secular generation. Many believe that a secular resource should be used for younger women with little or no faith to offer a shallow entry point for healing. This leaves me thinking: since Jesus calls people to heal in Him, why would we use a secular resource?
The Rise of the “Nones”
There are plenty of negative stereotypes about today’s young people—particularly when it comes to matters of faith and religion. In a 2021 survey by the Survey Center on American Life, more than one-third of Gen Z identified as religiously unaffiliated[1]. In fact, Some research puts the “Nones,” those without religious affiliation, as high as nearly 50% among Gen Z [2]. Young people today are navigating an ocean of superficiality, inundated by a constant stream of information through their digital devices. In a generation marked by discarded morality in pursuit of freedom, many search for guidance and direction in life.
Increasingly, young people are turning to practices that look suspiciously like traditional religion for comfort and security. GIRLS writer Freya India (2024) comments that several activities that hold Gen Zer’s’ interest appear to be God-free religion: “We don’t pray at night; we repeat positive affirmations. We don’t confess; we trauma dump. We don’t seek salvation; we go on healing journeys.” India notes that without the backbone of faith, these practices are just meant to make the penitent feel better, but declining mental health statistics tell us it isn’t working. Without the parts of religion that exist outside of us—the Church, Scripture, and an omnipotent God—spirituality is an exercise in futility and self-worship [3].
What is a generation burdened by anxiety and loneliness, crippled by digital obsessions, and adrift in the sea of therapy to find themselves calling for? They are calling for Jesus (Psalms 142:1-7).
Interest in Jesus
Amid the surge of the “Nones” and the rapid de-churching phenomenon in the United States, where we see the most significant and fastest religious shift in our history, Generation Z’s indifference toward traditional religion may not surprise us. Frequently Gen Z is often described as “spiritual but not religious.” While some view this trend with concern, it is a promising opportunity. It signifies that Gen Z is spiritually receptive, seeking something more profound than mainstream culture offers.
Ironically, while it seems true that many young men and women are suspicious of traditional religious institutions, it doesn’t mean they aren’t interested in learning more about Jesus. Data collected by Barna showed that nearly half of Gen Z adults are “extremely curious” about Jesus and have a positive view of who Jesus is [4]. Additionally, despite low Scripture engagement, around half of all Gen Z adults say their lives have been transformed by the Bible’s message [5]. The same dataset found that 31% of young people with no Christian affiliation said they were very motivated to learn more about Him. Even among non-practicing Christian and non-Christian Gen Z adults, a notable openness remains to engage with Scripture-based experiences and conversations. A significant 25% of non-practicing Gen Z Christians indicated they would consider accepting an invitation from a Christian friend to stream a church service online, watch a TV show or movie about Jesus, or attend a Christian concert. Moreover, approximately 18% of non-Christian Gen Z respondents expressed willingness to take part in a meal where biblical topics are discussed in a group setting [6].
Given this good news, Gen Z’s openness and curiosity create a unique opportunity to share the Gospel. In fact, why would we not?
Sharing the Gospel
When discussing resources to help walk the next generation through abortion healing, we can rely on the fact that God himself has called her to healing. When a young woman takes the first step on this journey, she’s already open to finding salvation outside of herself. Attempts at being overly accommodating by stripping the clear message of the Gospel out of the text are damaging (2 Tim. 3:16-17).
How do we share the gospel?
We must communicate the story—the whole story. Gen Zers are curious and thoughtful. They want answers to their questions. It’s tempting to avoid biblical principles, but this is a mistake. Stripping our message of hope and healing in Jesus won’t make Him more palatable; it will make Him seem less relevant to the issues she’s facing. Her openness and curiosity, as God has called her to at this moment in her life, create a unique opportunity to share the Gospel. Jesus’ life, as taught through the scriptures, offers answers to her most significant questions about who she is, where she came from, and where she is going—answers she won’t find anywhere or with anyone else.
Questions to Think About
- In a culture increasingly skeptical of traditional religious institutions but open to spiritual exploration, how can helpers effectively bridge the gap between secular approaches and the spiritual healing offered by faith-based resources?
- Considering the rise of the “Nones” and Generation Z’s spiritual receptivity, what responsibilities do faith helpers have in adapting their methods to effectively engage a younger generation of men and women who are curious about Jesus but wary of organized religion?
- How can the faith helper balance the imperative to share the Gospel in its entirety with the need to meet individuals where they are, particularly in sensitive areas like abortion healing, without diluting the transformative message of faith and redemption in Christ?
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[1] Over half of gen Z teens feel motivated to learn more about jesus. Barna Group. (2023). https://shorturl.at/QbPjV
[2] Carrington, A. (2024b, January 23). Quest for community: The possibility and problem for gen Z religiously and politically – washington examiner. Washington Examiner – Political News and Conservative Analysis About Congress, the President, and the Federal Government. https://shorturl.at/X2Ops
[3] India, F. (2024). Our new religion isn’t enough. Our New Religion Isn’t Enough . https://shorturl.at/PbHVN
[4] Over half of gen Z teens feel motivated to learn more about jesus. Barna Group. (2023). https://shorturl.at/QbPjV
[5] PR Newswire. (2023). A window to reach gen Z: American Bible Society Study finds 45% of young adults intrigued by message of scripture and jesus. PR Newswire: press release distribution, targeting, monitoring and marketing. https://shorturl.at/34cze
[6] PR Newswire. (2023). A window to reach gen Z: American Bible Society Study finds 45% of young adults intrigued by message of scripture and jesus. PR Newswire: press release distribution, targeting, monitoring and marketing. https://shorturl.at/34cze
Recently, I met with a friend who shared the loss of her granddaughter, who died at 20 weeks in utero. As we sat in our local sandwich shop, we cried together over the loss of the baby, the grief she shared with her daughter and son-in-law, and the dreams she and her husband had of being grandparents. The sun shining through the restaurant windows on that clear winter afternoon seemed to taunt us as it cast happy rays on the faces of people enjoying their day. For a time, we sat in the shadows.
I am often amazed that I work in this grief-care space, teaching others how to help people suffering after a reproductive loss. I frequently introduce myself as one who has “said all the wrong things” to hurting people. Embarrassed yet hoping to offer encouragement, I blurted untrue and unhelpful sentiments. As I have wrestled with my weakness about saying the wrong thing in situations, two specific truths come to mind that can help our grieving friends with the hope the Lord has offered through his Word.
First, we are reminded that the Lord draws near to those who are hurting. He is already there at the restaurant, coffee shop, or family gathering. The ministry of comfort involves the Holy Spirit (Acts 9:31), God, the Father (2 Cor 1:3,4), and Christ, the Son (2 Cor 1:5; Phil 2:1), who is abundantly qualified to comfort man. Dane Ortlund writes, “Our pain never outstrips what he himself shares in. We are never alone. That sorrow that feels so isolating, so unique, was endured by him in the past and is now shouldered by him in the present.” We can breathe a sigh of relief, knowing that God is already there, near to those in need. His presence has already begun the work at hand.
Second, God has called us to care for His sheep, which means that when they suffer loss, we need to be there for them by making ourselves available in humility and gentleness (Eph. 4:2). In the past, perhaps you have not been a student of your words or deeds in this area. But God is kind to reveal this to us when we ask Him to be the the person who offers the comfort and wisdom with which Christ comforts us. We can console each other through a gentle hand on the shoulder, a silent embrace, or shared tears. Other times, meaningful words are shared. In every case, it means taking our eyes off ourselves and looking outward to help others. It means, in the words of Benjamin Warfield, “Not that we should live one life, but a thousand lives—binding ourselves to a thousand souls by the filaments of so loving a sympathy that their lives become ours.”
Hearing our friend’s stories are a precious gift. Our conversation continually can point to Jesus as the Wonderful Counselor who brings the ultimate comfort to the suffering soul. With that knowledge, we can rest assured.
My colleague, Tanya, and I travel quite a bit for work as we speak at seminars, attend conferences, and provide training. On any given flight, we are asked where and what we do, and I can tell you, it’s not always sexy for others to learn that we are reproductive grief and loss educators. Some people will tell us their precious and sacred stories, and others will not look us in the eye for the rest of the journey. On one such flight, Tanya sat beside a beautiful young woman who asked what the purpose of our trip was. Tanya quietly mentioned our travel plans, then sat back to see where the conversation would lead. Soon, the woman looked up at the air vent, hoping to find the meaning of these words there. She hesitatingly asked, “Miscarriage?” Tanya breathed out, “Yes.” After a long pause, the woman asked, “Abortion?” Again, Tanya answered, “Yes.” Finally, the woman looked up, searching for words in the sky beyond the plane, and asked, “Hysterectomy?”
Yes.
The woman went on to share with Tanya how she had to have a complete hysterectomy at a young age and was now grieving the children she would never bear.
Reproductive loss is any experience of grief in a person’s life related to their reproductive health, decisions, fertility, the outcomes of a pregnancy, or the creation or care of their family[1]. It can involve the pain of miscarriage, the agony of stillbirth, perinatal and infant loss, and the complex emotions tied to infertility, assisted reproduction, and abortion. It also extends to adoption, children born with congenital disabilities, and any loss affecting a person’s reproductive well-being.
Reproductive loss is a widespread and often unspoken part of life. Miscarriage alone accounts for a quarter of all pregnancies, resulting in about two million losses yearly in the United States. Yet, it differs from other forms of grief in that parents who have experienced reproductive loss may have limited tangible memories of their baby. Their loss is silent, and they often grieve without the support or recognition they need to heal. Additionally, when individuals form deep connections with their unborn or newborn children and experience any loss, grief inevitably follows.
Knowing that many people struggle with reproductive loss is half the battle of becoming a source of understanding and empathy for them. Because it is a private (or scary) topic, we seldom delve into these particular and painfully common tragedies. Thus, distressed women and men are not receiving the biblical guidance they desperately need. Instead, struggling with their pain in isolation, they often seek comfort and answers online, where much of the content they stumble upon focuses on the emotional dimensions of losing a child rather than applying the truths of God’s Word to their grief. While they find empathy in the articles they read, the profound hope embedded in the gospel of Jesus Christ is missing.
With just a little bit of information on this topic, we can listen to these stories with empathy and offer the hope and comfort afforded us in Christ Jesus.
Tricia Lewis, Co-Founder Reproductive Loss Network
[1] Flores and Lewis, 2023; Earle et al., 2008; Price, 2008; Roth, 2018
Sheila Harper, Founder of SaveOne.
Everything in me said abortion was wrong, but I charged forward with really bad advice, from even worse friends, and I went through with it anyway. March 29, 1985 was the day of my most regrettable mistake. I was nineteen years old and making decisions of life and death that I had no business making. My boyfriend broke up with me shortly after and I really don’t blame him. He begged me not to have the abortion and I selfishly did anyway. Don’t ever let anyone tell you this is just a woman’s issue. Men suffer from the aftermath of this choice as well.
For seven years after this date my life quickly became a mess. I started drinking, then consuming vast amounts of drugs. I spent all my money going to concerts and getting backstage, and signing up for credit cards and maxing them out. I suffered through a rape, and I went through relationships like water, not committing to anything or anybody. I became obsessed with death, hoping that if I took enough drugs, or drank enough alcohol I wouldn’t wake up. After an attempted suicide and being consumed with hoping to die, I met a man in a bar and cleaned myself up enough to get married.
My husband Jack, is the real hero in all of this. He loved me even as messed up as I was and lived with the drama of my life for years. We had two sons right away. My first son I have always felt was a gift from God to wake me up. That pregnancy got my attention and made me realize my life was worth living, if not for myself, then for this precious creature entrusted to me. My second son was indeed born on March 29th, the very day I had taken a life, God gave me another gift straight from Him.
Not long in to our marriage I heard about a class being offered for women who had experienced abortion and were having trouble afterward. Being in a group with others who had suffered the same experience after abortion, validated those seven years of isolation and loneliness. This Bible study I attended gave me back my life. It showed me how I needed to accept Jesus forgiveness and forgive myself. It was an incredible discovery and a much needed transformation.
God has walked me through forgiving the abusers in my life, owning my bad choices, and wiping my slate clean. He has made me a victor of my past circumstances…no longer a victim. What happened to me is not what defines me, but rather strengthens who I am today. The enemy meant all that junk for nothing but destruction in my life, but God used it all for the betterment of myself, my awesome family, and to help others through the same situations.
So there’s the real story. Without Grace I’m a mess, true and simple. With Grace life is awesome.
Please feel free to contact me by emailing info@saveone.org Or you can check out saveone.org for the same kind of help that was offered me and changed my life. Hope to hear from you soon!
By sharing our stories of hope and healing, we offer an exceptional gift to another. So often, in times of suffering and pain, we benefit from knowing we are not alone. Our words can make a significant difference to someone who needs to hear a Biblical perspective of hope.
You may have heard the statistics, “1 out of 4 women by age 45 will have had an abortion.” And of those women and men, so many have not experienced God’s grace, forgiveness, and love. And of their families, friends, and loved ones, they may think they don’t have permission to grieve the loss.
If you have not experienced abortion personally, I ask you to pray for God’s wisdom in how you can become a safe person for those you may know or come into contact with who are suffering from abortion. Being a safe person is vital, and it grants the Lord the opportunity to use you as a healing vessel. Unfortunately, the abortion-minded and those who have chosen abortion often hurt and feel isolated. However, there are several ways to pursue education to help those who grieve their decisions. Learn more here.
If you have been affected by abortion and have not sought after abortion care, I ask for you to pray for discernment and guidance from the Lord on your next steps. You may think you need to wait for the “right time.” But the reality is, the enemy will never allow that feeling to come. If you would like more information on care after an abortion, please reach out to us. No judgment, only help to hope. — Tanya and Tricia.
